Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Dr. M

With my health insurance, I have to have a "primary care provider", a gateway doc who refers me, when necessary, to specialists. I call him my "doctor-doctor", and I go to Dr. G.

Except when Dr. G is not available, and then my health insurance allows me to go to another doctor in Dr. G's medical group.

For the last couple of years, whenever I called to make an appointment, it seemed that Dr. G was never available. But another doctor in his group, Dr. M, always was.

And I didn't mind. I really liked Dr. M anyway, so much so that I was considering making him my doctor-doctor.

Until I found out why he was always available.

As it turns out, twenty years ago, Dr. M admitted to exposing and fondling himself in front of a female patient in an exam room.

*squuuuiiick*

Man, that's just ... skeevy. Pervy. Extremely disturbing.

And you know what? You know what the first thing I thought was?

"Oh, well, maybe it was a consensual thing that got out of hand. I mean, it's not like he's an ob-gyn; she wasn't up in stirrups or anything. Maybe it was just a misunderstanding. Or maybe she was an ex-girlfriend with a vendetta."

Oh my dear lord, I was making EXCUSES for this dick-pulling perv.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!

If some dude pulled that shit in front of ME, the first thing I'd do is kick him in the nuts so hard he wouldn't be using his equipment for the foreseeable future. Then I'd run screaming out of the exam room, making sure EVERYBODY in a hundred-yard radius knew EXACTLY what just happened. Then I'd make sure charges were filed. Then I'd probably take out a BILLBOARD to let the whole town in on it.

And yet here I was, making excuses for this doctor. Because I liked him. He was a nice doctor. And after all, it was twenty years ago and he was young and

SHIT.

Perv.

7 comments:

Badass Nature Girl said...

Wow. I don't know what to say. About the situation, not that you defended him.

My husband's original pain management doctor was busted on some thing along these lines several years ago. We was young too. I wonder how he was able to maintain a job in this field? Maybe all he had to do was go to another state? I think though, that it should be made public knowledge what he did, and then it's up to the individuals if they want to take that chance.

Are you still going to see him? I mean, you know now, and like you said, you can just kick him in the junk and so forth. I at least have to hand it to you that you're not being very judgemental. Some people would see it that he just made a mistake..a bad judgement call and others might see it as he's a predator. A sex offender. Me? I don't know what decision I'd make, as far as continuing to keep going to him or not.

rockygrace said...

He was censured and fined and made to go to counseling, and he was monitored by the state medical board for many years. It was recently made public in a newspaper article about doctors who are reimbursed by pharma companies.

And no, I'm not going to see him anymore. The thought of him with his dick in his hand ... YUCK. NO.

Should he have been allowed to keep his medical license? That's what I'm struggling with. I don't know. I don't think so. Especially since, as far as I know, this only very recently was made public, so it's not like his patients (like ME) could make an informed decision as to whether to go to him or not.

the queen said...

Geeehhhhhh. Could you do this before you drop him? Go there and ask him what a "normal" penis looks like because you think the ones you've seen must be deformed? K thanks. Oh, and secretly videotape him.

Badass Nature Girl said...

You know what? Call me a pessimist, but I'd be really surprised that this was his first time flashing his dick where he shouldn't have, or being involved in inappropriate public behavior with it. If it is, he better never become some other kind of criminal because he's stupid to get caught the first time (although I am glad he got caught!) I hate to think what he does behind closed doors....of course all of these comment are based on not knowing the other parties side to the story, their age, etc. Maybe it was a bit of flirting gone wrong. Hard to say.

~~Silk said...

Actually, we don't even know his side of the story. And it's probably been 20 years with no problem. If he's an otherwise good doctor, it wouldn't bother me at all.

rockygrace said...

See, that's the thing, ~~Silk, I DON'T know his side of the story. I don't know if it's possible to know the full story, sometimes. Does that mean I shouldn't judge anybody, ever, or take past behavior into consideration? And after how many years is the slate "wiped clean"? And does it make a difference how serious the incident was?

As you can see, I'm really having a hard time with this.

And I can safely say that I've been gainfully employed for over thirty years, now, and have never EVER felt the urge to flash my boobs at work. :) So there's that.

~~Silk said...

I judge people by how they are with me, not by anything I've heard. That's just me. Mostly it works fine, and occasionally it doesn't.

What I do know for absolute sure is that I wouldn't want anyone prejudging me based on what they've heard or past transgressions.