Last night, I ... I ...
I bought some air. In a can.
I KNOW. I am old enough to remember when bottled water first became popular, and I would laugh at the idea that people would PAY for WATER. What's next, buying AIR?
Yeah. Last night I bought some air.
I can explain!
You see, the kittens are being kept in the spare bedroom. I put a screen door on the frame so that I could check in on them, and I put a latch on the door so they could not get out. But it got so every time I came to the door, they would charge it, and when I OPENED the door, they'd all go flying out into the rest of the house, which is really not good since they are supposed to be in quarantine until all their leukemia tests come back negative.
So! I'd have three manic kittens tearing around the house, and I'd pick up one and plop it back in the room, then pick up ANOTHER and open the door to put IT back in the room and Kitten #1 would go flying out again, and ... yeah. A regular three-kitten circus.
I thought about squirting them with a water pistol when they charged the door, but the idea of cleaning up wet carpeting several times a day didn't really appeal to me. And I didn't want the kittens getting wet and possibly cold. And then I remember reading somewhere about somebody who used a can of compressed air - the stuff you use to clean computer keyboards - and spraying the kittens with air to discourage them.
So! After work I stopped and bought a can of air (sob), and went home, and went to the kitten room, and when they charged the door I gave 'em the old air. Psssssst! Psssssst!
Well. Samson and Delilah just stood there, stunned, for a second, and then flew under the bed. Dumplin, bless his heart, stood his ground, all, "aaahhhhh! A refreshing breeze!" So I psssst'd him again, and this time he scooted.
Success! But then I felt like an axe murderer, because when I went in the room, the kittens were all, "What WAS that? Why did you DO that to us? You SCARED us!"
So, I guess I'd have to call it a qualified victory. Yes, it gets them away from the door, but it also scares the shit out of them.
Plus? The air? Is, like, SEVEN BUCKS A CAN. For AIR.
Whoever thought of THAT is making a fortune.