Friday, July 03, 2009

Three Months

Number of cigarettes I would have smoked between April 3 and today, had I not stopped smoking: 2,700


Money saved to date: $481.50


Observation: People who never smoked do not think it's a big deal that you quit. People who used to smoke, and quit themselves, have evidently forgotten how blessed hard it is to quit, and do not think it's a big deal that you quit. Active smokers are threatened that you quit and stay away from you. In short, don't expect any kudos. From anybody. Which kind of sucks.


I sometimes dream that I'm smoking. In my dreams I'm driving in the car, and I look down and there's a lit cigarette in my hand, and the ashtray is full of butts. And in my dream, I'm all, "Oh nooooo! When did I start smoking again? Whyyyyyyyyy?"


And that's all I'm gonna say about dreams. Sorry about that brief lapse into dream analysis.



So! One-quarter of a year, smoke-free. Dear jeezus, I hope it gets easier.

6 comments:

the queen said...

People with fathers who died of lung caner and still smoked in hospice say "KUDUOS!"

rockygrace said...

Thanks, queen!

Unknown said...

People who smoked for a brief period twenty-five years ago and STILL WANT CIGARETTES when they get stressed out think you are doing a stunning thing.

Happy Independence Day.

inflammatory writ said...

Dude. SERIOUSLY. I hate self righteous non smokers (as you know, because you read my blog), but even worse, I hate self-righteous EX smokers. Maybe it's like childbirth and you forget how hard it is? Whatever. Either way, it's like screaming in the middle of the forest - no one can hear you and no one cares!

I for one salute you. You were a heavier smoker than me (I did maths!), and this shit is hard. You're doing awesome. We're both doing awesome. Hang in there.

signed - your fat, depressed, anxious, craving a smoke like nothing else fellow blogger.

rockygrace said...

Thanks, Bridgett and Inflammatory! Nice to know I'm not the only one.

I just wish I could go back and tell fifteen-year-old me, "DON'T LIGHT IT!!"

Anonymous said...

I suppose I'm one of those self-righteous non-smokers, but I do have sympathy for those who are trying to quit. It's an addiction, physical and emotional, so it's an uphill battle. I can't even stop biting my fingernails. So, I'm proud of you and I'm happy that you're succeeding. I can only imagine how difficult it is, and I'm glad that you are continuing to choose to do right by your body every single day.