… As some of you may know, I loathe lawn-mowing. It is easily my least-favorite activity. Between the christless lawn mower that refuses to start half the time, and that time last summer when I ran over a nest of yellowjackets while mowing … well, mowing and I are not friends.
And my neighbors are all, like, “Why don’t you use Andy? Andy mows everybody’s lawn! He’s great! And he only charges ten bucks a yard!”
Here is my problem with Andy. And here’s where I’m gonna get into trouble.
Andy is developmentally disabled. Now, that’s NOT my problem with him. My problem lies with letting a developmentally disabled man operate power equipment on my property. It just … doesn’t seem like a good idea, from a liability standpoint.
And also? I am old enough to remember when Andy was a kid. A kid with a predilection for matches and an ugly little arson habit. He actually burned down two houses as a child.
So giving him access to my garage and a can of gas doesn’t seem like such a hot idea.
I guess I’m gonna have to keep mowing my own lawn, dammit. Because it sure beats an injury lawsuit or a house of ashes.