2. Work-related: People who use up a roll of toilet paper or paper towels and don't replace it, even though they know exactly where the replacement rolls are. People who leave time on the microwave. People who drink the last of the pot of coffee and don't ask if they should make more. People who don't flush. I work with a bunch of Philistines.
3. Crossword clues using Roman numerals. "Half of MXIV". Look, the last time anybody studied Roman numerals was in sixth grade, OKAY? Knock it off already.
4. While we're on the subject of crossword puzzles, you know what annoys the shit out of me? When I come across an answer word that I've never even heard of before. Example: Crossword clue - "gladly". Answer - "lief". Whhaaaaaa? So I look it up, and sure enough, "lief" is a word. People, I am forty-eight years old. How is it that I am STILL discovering new words? It makes me look like a damn idiot.
5. Screaming children in grocery stores. Kids, what the hell do you have to CRY about? Your life is golden right now. Free housing, free food, people who love you to pieces, and a mom to wipe your butt when you crap your pants. Your life will never again be this good. QUIT CRYING, OKAY?
6. Hyperbole and a Half. She was always a sporadic post-er, but she announced her book deal in May and then disappeared. Jeez. She could have written War and Peace by now, instead of some picture book featuring crude MS Paint drawings. And the book still isn't out. Or else it came out and landed with a thud. I think the blog-to-book thing is about done. Except for PW, of course, who could sell shit-on-a-stick and make a fortune.
7. The "A.N.A." clothing line from J.C. Penney. Surely by now, someone MUST have told the head schmucks at Penney's that "ana" is a code word for anorexia. Google "pro-ana" if you don't believe me.
Yeah, so here it is September and I am NOT happy about it. Can you tell?
2 comments:
She got a book deal? There is no god.
I know, right?
I think the problem with blogger books is that, well, I already read their blog. Unless the book is totally new material, I'm probably not gonna buy it.
Then again, there are lots of people out there who DON'T read blogs, so for them even recycled old blog posts are NEW material, so there you go.
And oh my god hahahaha I read some blogs that are ... less than stellar ... and the commenters are all, like, "You should write a book!" and I'm thinking, "No, please don't."
Gosh, I'm a snot.
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