Thursday, February 26, 2009

Unintended Consequences

A while back, I was on the Stress Diet and/or the Dental Diet for quite some time, and I lost some weight. And for whatever reason, I never gained that weight back. Which actually sort of pleased me, until this past weekend, when I was trying on bras and realized I'd actually gone down a bra cup size.

Whoa, nelly! Those girls need all the help they can get. So I was thinking, "Jeez, time to amp up the calorie intake just a little", and then I got to thinking, "What if it's not the weight loss? What if they're shrinking and deflating, like old ladies' boobs do?

C'est impossible! I'm only forty-six, for Pete's sake. I can't really be experiencing old-lady-boob-shrinkage already, can I? Can I?

Don't answer that.


kitkat said...

In my family, there is no old-woman shrinkage. If only! We just seem to grow and grow with age. I'm sure you aren't shrinking, though, because you'd probably notice it in more than just your breasts.

Bridgett said...

Yeah, well, maybe. The weight loss tends to reduce the strap size, but since boobs are fat repositories, it could be that the cup size diminished a little. On the other hand, as women move towards menopause, shrinking and sagging tends to happen. My boobs have been on the old lady side since breastfeeding, really, so I've had ten years to get used to low-rider breasts. My recent weight loss makes me realize, though, that they're not as saggy as I thought now that my stomach is smaller in relationship to them.

The good news is that you can do something non-surgical to help. I have found that those premolded foam-cup t-shirt bras (they sell them everywhere, even that classy French store Tar-jay) reshapes and pushes around one's boobs so that you get some cleavage again. It's like a facelift for boobs, in that the post-bra silhouette will resemble roughly what they looked like before gravity did its work.

rockygrace said...

Crapmart sells Bestform molded push-up bras for, like, eight bucks a pop. Looks like I'll have to pick up a few. (sob)

Seriously, I've been a 36B my entire adult life, and to find that a 34A (!) actually fits better is disheartening, to say the least. The last time I was a 34A was in junior high.

But then again, it's not like my sense of self-worth was based on my awesome rack. 36B ain't exactly anything to write home about.

But 34A?! Excuse me while I go apply for membership in the IBTC.

listie said...

Don't feel so bad. If she weren't so sensitive about the issue, my daughter could still fit into the training bras they sell at LimitedToo.