I ... I don't know what's come over me

So!  Halloween!  I used to just lame-ass it with some Dollar Tree candy and a couple of plastic pumpkins, but ever since I bought the giant rats a couple of years ago, I've become more ... enthusiastic.

The vampire bats have been hung. This year I took a bunch of plastic pumpkins and hung them from the tree branches out front to make pumpkin trees.  When a neighbor said that there was no such thing as pumpkin trees, I told him, "There is now."

Instead of doing Dollar Tree candy, I've stocked up on Snickers and Milky Ways for the trick-or-treaters.  Hey, if I'm gonna end up with leftover candy, it's gotta be quality, dammit.  I ordered fortune-telling fish from Oriental Trading, and I've got a bunch of spider rings and skull erasers and the whole nine yards.  I think ... I think I'm gonna do goodie bags. *gasp*.

Dudes ... what is happening to me?  Has the ghost of Martha Stewart taken over?  Because I am the ANTI-Martha.  I have never even LOOKED at Pinterest.  I don't DO that sh*t.

It's like I don't even know myself anymore.

If I start posting recipes for zombie punch or something, hold an intervention, okay?  I would appreciate it.