Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Apartment Living

We are having a tenant shuffle in my building. The apartment next to mine has been vacant since last fall, when Bill moved out. Now Stephen, who currently lives below me, is moving up next to me. This is the guy I have had to talk to several times about the level of the bass on his stereo. Picture it, if you will: I am hanging out in my apartment on a Saturday, minding my own business, and from downstairs all I can hear is "boomp boomp, boomp boomp boomp, boomp boomp" from the bass on Stephen's stereo. After five hours of this, I finally lose my shit and go downstairs and knock on Stephen's door. And when he opens his door, I hear "BOOMP, BOOMP, BOOMP BOOMP BOOMP", so loud that my hair is practically blowing back from my head from the decibels. And I ask him to please turn down the bass on his stereo, and he says "Oh! Is it too loud? Really?! Because I can hardly hear it!" Oh, Pleeease. Give me a break.

So we have had this particular conversation a few times since then, the last time a few days before Christmas, when things took a nasty turn. After a few hours of "boomp, boomp, boomp boomp boomp", I knocked on his door, and he basically told me to shove it. That he had a "right" to listen to his stereo as loud as he wanted to, blah blah blah. This is kind of a scary (creepy) dude, and I wasn't about to get into a pissing match with him, so I just said, "I'm sorry you feel that way", and walked away, planning on calling the landlord the next day. Note to Stephen: It's not a good idea to tell the building manager (me) to shove it when she asks you to turn down your (way too loud) music. Especially when music levels are specifically addressed in the Building Policy that you signed before you moved in.

SO, the next day, before I could call the landlord, Stephen came to me and apologized, said he had been having a really bad day the day before, and he would no longer be playing his stereo at a loud level. I accepted his apology (because I am nothing if not gracious (!)), and advised him to buy headphones if he wanted to crank his stereo. I have had no stereo volume problems with Stephen since then.

But, now he is going to be living next to me, and let's just say I'm a little (very) wary. NOTE TO APARTMENT DWELLERS: None of your fellow tenants, and that means NONE, wants to hear your loud music. Nobody appreciates it. Nobody is sitting in their apartment going "Gee, it's so nice of him to share his Young Jeezy at ear-splitting volume with me!" Just so you know.

It turns out that the reason Stephen is moving upstairs is because the landlord has a disabled uncle who is moving into Stephen's old first floor apartment (I am assuming he is physically disabled and can't handle stairs). You know what my first thought was? "Great, he's disabled, he'll be nice and quiet!" HOW BAD IS THAT? Why on earth would I assume that since he is disabled, he doesn't like to crank his stereo?

So the new guy moves in on Friday. Lord help me.

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