Wednesday, January 08, 2014
It's not a BUS, for Christ's sake
My family is all kinds of messed up, which I guess is inevitable when there's a ton of kids, but I think the WTF award, funeral division, has to go to my sister Ditzy, who, when learning that her son was running late on his way to the funeral service, asked the minister to hold the funeral until he got there.
Ooooooookay.
WTF award Number Two goes to her son, who could not manage to make it to his grandmother's funeral on time. There was even a visitation beforehand, meaning he had a built-in cushion, and he still managed to display an utter lack of respect by showing up late.
WTF award Number Three goes to the minister, who was asked to pick the hymns, and proceeded to choose hymns that no one had ever heard of.
And the final WTF award goes to certain members of the family, who called dibs on which of the flower arrangements they wanted to take home with them. I just ... can't with these people. Really?
And then there was all the fun of family members trying to get here and then get back to Florida, Georgia, Texas and Washington state during the worst stretch of air travel in recent memory.
Yep, that's my family. They can even f*ck up a funeral.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Oh, the funeral stories I could tell. Maybe I will on my own blog, it would start with my cousin arriving incognito (really in costume) and proceeding to fall into the coffin while she was wailing. It was great.
Funerals bring out the appalling behavior in people. The minister who preachers your grandfather into hell ("Now we all know he was not saved and his soul is, even as his body lay before is, consumed in eternal torment")? Oh yes. The wailing flailing cousin who knocks the coffin partly off the platform with her antics? Check. The aunt who loudly opines "Well, it's not like he's going to get more dead..." when arguing that the entire group of mourners should stop at Denny's on the way to the remote rural cemetery. Yep. And of course, the bickering over flowers, the unexpected outing of the "bachelor" cousin, etc...been there and done them all. I think it's so awful because then you can feel relieved when they all go away.
After my mother's funeral, my mom's best friend and I took most of the flower arrangements to the county nursing home. It was her idea and a great one. There was no bickering, we just loaded them into my car and went.
fmcetc. and bridgett, I'm glad I'm not the only one.
And Becs, I thought that taking the flowers to a nursing home was the norm. Not in my family, evidently.
Oh! And I forgot to mention that my crazy neighbors showed up. And I'm not even gonna TELL you where my sister Ditz and I went urn shopping. (The funeral home wanted six hundred bucks. NO.)
and then there was that same urn, mysteriously weeping ... Dudes, I have GOT to tell that one.
Post a Comment