That lamp is the reason I bought my house.
You see, I had been living happily in a one-bedroom apartment for many years. It was in a four-unit building and had a big backyard so I could garden. The rent was insanely cheap. Most of the other tenants were long-term and we all got along fairly well, in general. If a jerk moved in, the landlord, who was a sweetie, was pretty good at getting them to move on.
And then, in 2007, the sweetie landlord sold the building. To an out-of-town slumlord who was determined to keep all the units rented, all the time, no matter to whom he had to rent them in order to do it. And then the slumlord moved his father into the apartment below mine. His developmentally disabled father, who was deaf as a post and, as a result, kept his TV cranked to max volume ALL THE TIME.
Finally, after a YEAR of listening to old B-movies at maximum volume, the dad dropped dead. But by that time, I'd had enough, and was tentatively running the numbers, seeing if I had enough money to start looking at houses.
And then the next tenant moved into the downstairs apartment.
This dude looked, well, menacing. The other tenants were scared of him. He had all kinds of sketchy people going in and out of his apartment at all hours. I wondered who he was and where he came from.
By now it was getting close to Christmas-time, 2008, and I had been looking for a stained-glass floor lamp for the living room, for my Christmas present to myself. (When you are single, you give yourself Christmas presents. I do, anyway. SHUT UP.) When I found the lamp in the pic above on line, I fell in love. Oh, I wanted that lamp. It cost more than I wanted to spend, and the shipping alone was going to be fifty bucks, but screw it. Life in the apartment building was getting scary, it was dark and cold outside, and I ordered the lamp. And waited for it to arrive.
And waited. And waited.
I checked with FedEx; they said the lamp had been delivered to the building. I checked with some of the other tenants in the building; nobody had seen the lamp.
Finally, knowing that the lamp was probably gone for good, I called the cops. Who found the lamp in the apartment of the guy downstairs. Who said he was "holding" it for me. For four days.
I'd had enough. My neighbors were stealing from me. They took my beautiful lamp. I had to get out.
And the rest, my fraaaaaynds, is history. I bought a house. I live where I live now, all because of the lamp.
It's a pretty lamp, isn't it?