Outsourcing

So!  I bought a new TV!

I really didn't want to; I was pleased with my twenty-two-year old, nineteen-inch Samsung.  Really!

But it was taking longer to warm up, and little fireworks-type static streaks were starting to appear in the picture, and I figured it was time to start shopping, before the old girl crapped completely. 

I'll admit it; I splurged.  I went with a massive TWENTY-NINE INCH SCREEN.

I KNOW!  They will be able to watch my TV from the space station, what with that gigantic, eye-popping twenty-nine inch screen!

So, I bought the TV on line and had it delivered to the store (free!),  picked it up, took it home, opened up the box, took a look at the set-up diagrams,

and went cross-eyed.

Confession time:  I don't DO electronics.  Do. Not.  It is one of the few things, auto repair springing first to mind, that I gladly outsource.   A simple wiring diagram can bring me to tears; I can't help it.  I have zero interest in learning about electronica.  ZERO.  Hand me the remote and get out of my way, is as complicated as I want TV things to get.

So I called the cable company.  They gladly sent someone out to my house, to relieve me of having to try to force-feed electronic wiring diagram info through my feeble little brain, for the low, low price of thirty-nine-ninety-five.

And even though I am so cheap I can squeeze a nickel until Jefferson squeals?  That thirty-nine-ninety-five service charge was worth every penny.  EVERY PENNY.

And boy oh boy, technology sure has changed in the last quarter-century, because the picture is aMAZing.  I feel like some hayseed staring at his very first motion-picture show, it's that good.

But!  I have a new rule:  No heads bigger than my own.

Because when I'm watching, say, the nightly news, on my new GIANT 29" screen, the anchor's head is the size of my own.

And that's ... disconcerting, somehow.  Like another actual person is in the room with me or something.

So I think that 29" is about as big as I'm going to go.  I don't want a 40", or a 50", or a 60".   I wouldn't want to have a bunch of scary giants in my house.