Random

Lots of random in my life lately.

Okay, so, first off, this post mentions a spider, so if that will squick you out, please to avoid. I will mention it when I get to the spider part so you can avert your eyes if necessary.


I bought a dress at Kohl's the other weekend that cost me ... zero.  Originally forty-eight bucks, marked down to $9.60, and I had a ten dollar gift postcard from Kohl's, so ... zero.

I have a couple of thoughts on this (because God knows I have thoughts on everything):

1.  Does anybody actually ever buy anything at full retail?  Especially at stores like Kohl's, where everything is on sale all the damn time?  Was that dress EVER offered at forty-eight bucks?  Somehow I doubt it.

2.  I have no idea why Kohl's keeps sending me these ten-dollar gift cards.  I mean, I'm not complaining or anything, but every few weeks, they send me a card (there was another one in my mailbox yesterday), I take it to the store, I pick out something that costs less than ten bucks, and I'm good.  They must have figured out by now that I'm not a typical shopper, and I'm not going to take that card and go spend, like, fifty bucks or something.  (and yes, you can absolutely find stuff for less than ten bucks at Kohl's.  Like the dress I just bought.  Clearance jewelry is also a sure thing, as is hosiery (early this spring I set myself up with tights for life by combining an 80% off sale with ten-dollar gift cards).  Towels are also on sale for less than ten bucks all the time.  I will never need to buy a beach towel again.  Thanks, Kohl's!  I don't know why you keep sending me these cards, but don't stop!

Okay, moving on.  Do you ever dream about bloggers?  Like, dream that you're a relative to a blogger or a neighbor or something?  Do you ever feel kind of ... creepy, afterward?  Like you've somehow invaded their personal life or something?  No?  Just me?  Okay, then , forget I asked.

I've been trying to eat fewer processed foods lately, just because it seems like a good idea, so I bought some real sliced cheese, as opposed to the processed cheese product pre-wrapped slices I usually buy.  And ... I like the fake stuff better.  Like, a LOT better.  Who let me out of the trailer park?

Is anybody besides me watching "Chrisley Knows Best"?  It's this reality TV show about a guy who is as gay as the day is long, his wife (a female)(!), and their five kids.  They're really, really rich, but he's really involved in his kids' lives, and it's pretty interesting to watch him keep his teen kids in line as they try to work around him.  He says he's spent over a million bucks on drug rehab for his oldest son, who has an out-of-wedlock daughter, and he and his wife are open about all the plastic surgery they've had, and it's just ... interesting. 

Utopia?  Anyone watching that one?  I haven't, yet, because it looks too much like Big Brother to me, but I was just wondering if it was any good.


Okay, here comes the spider part.  YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.  I was cleaning the foster room the other weekend, moving things from side to side so I could vacuum underneath everything, when I turned around and saw ... the biggest goddam spider I've ever seen in my LIFE, outside of a tarantula.  Thank GOD it was dead, because I think *I* would be dead of fright right now if it wasn't.  Thing was HUGE.  aaaggggh. The gigantic corpse was where a throw rug had been, before I picked it up to clean.  I must have picked up the rug and turned around with it before I saw the spider.  It must have crawled under there and died.  I'm surprised I didn't hear its DEATH THROES, it was so flippin' big.  Before I could even let myself process the fact that a spider that big was in MY F*CKING HOUSE, I just vacuumed up the corpse.  And now I'm trying to forget that the whole thing ever happened.  Maybe it was just ... a big wad of yarn or something.  Black yarn. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Spider?  What spider?  *shudder*